Sunday, 18 January 2015

The Secret

Happy New Year!!

I wish 2015 is a wonderful year filled with abundance of health, love, passion, success and much accomplishments.

I spend the New Year' Eve at my friend's house with some other friends. Thinking about what we desired for the new year, we got to the conclusion we were all sick of lackness, absence,  deprivation,  scarcity, poverty,  shortage, dearth, famine and paucity of any kind in any aspects of our lives.

I kind of led us to this wish of abundance of everything that is good and brings us healthy happiness for 2015 and on.This comes as a conclusion from a long journey where I spent years starving on the desert that was my life. I was the perfect portrait of happiness anorexia.  Anytime happiness would come forth to my life, I would try to take  hold of it by measuring how much of it I deserved to take. Since, by that time, my self- allowed quota for happiness was so little, I couldn't have enough before feeling guilty.

I always loved Narcissus and Goldmund by Hermann Hesse and, even though I was so found of both characters, even though I saw how much of Narcissus was in me, even though I knew how desperate I was to be in comfort, I still kept myself locked in the desert of privation.  I was like the blind that does mot want to see. By that time, I really couldn't see another possibility for me. Like the world's worst criminal,  I setenced myself to the worst penalty.

I was guilty and no matter what people would tell me could make me believe the opposite.

So, when was the turning point to becoming fond of abundance?

The turning point was achieved by psychology help, of course, that led me to meditation and a true encounter to my true self. Enlightment made me unlocked from all the illusional  world of privation and suffering I was. It was really interesting how it made me rethink my entire world and reorganize things.

I didn't read The Secret or such books and whenever someone talked about suvh things I somehow thought foolish. But, after all my journey, I have discovered that lots of those concepts are actually true. However, the real secret is not found in books or religions, I think it is the knowledge of life within ourselves. I mean you may also learn from books but for it to ring true it must be worked inside.

Then, for the first time, l conjured all my powers to be happy. I started accepting and loving myself as I am, then I got myself done with the past and eliminated guilty and regret from my life. I let myself go and run free. Suddenly, the desert around me was starting to grow green leaves, flowers and a stream. The change in my attitude towards any situation was positive to better results. I started experiencing something that had sounded fleeting for me for so  long: constant happiness. When I was younger, I would feel that suffering was constant and happiness was fleeting. And that was the truth. That was the world I chose myself to live. By meditating, I also discovered my power as an individual and as part of the universe. We are all Gods and our powers are beyond our imagination.

I am happy for being alive and for having destroyed the sadness inside me. I am happy for being me and for being awake.

I think it was a terrible year I had in 2014 but it was also a successful year. Like a Phoenix,  I was terribly sick to die, afraid of dying, afraid of the changes on reborning, but, then, after all this process, I feel like I can start couting my life from 2015 and on. I have no doubts the brightest days I have to live start from now on because I feel, at last, happy about myself and about my life and ready to enjoy every day.

Happy 2015~